Steps

Mr Sweetness and Light took his very first steps with two legs! He got to try it out for about 15 to 20 minutes. This first leg is a rough one so changes can be made to suit his uniqueness.  More work will be done on it since it couldn't be adjusted any further for him. Our prosthetist said to expect more adjustments as he learns to walk because his gait and stance will change over time. At his next appointment, the leg will get fine-tuned even more and then he will meet with the physical therapist who will help learn to use it.





I cannot begin to describe the joy I felt watching his first few steps. Since I didn't have any of my children as infants, this is the first 'first step' experience I've had with any of my kids. I wasn't sure whether to make a fuss--after all he is 15 years old and boys that age don't really want that kind of fussing since they're 'grown up now!'

Firsts...

When I began the journey to adopt my children there were many things I never imagined: Telling nine year old Miracle Man to come down from 25 feet up a fir tree the day before major surgery; Explaining to 14 year old Mr. Sweetness and Light why he shouldn't climb on top of our roof at 10 p.m. to look at the stars (never mind how he got himself up there in the first place!); Learning about hair--how MM didn't like it--never mind that he was using the clippers to shave the dreaded stuff off the tops of his arms; Spending 1 1/2 hours curling Miss Sunshine's hair for photo day.

The past year has been full of all sorts of firsts: Mr. Sweetness and Light played sports for the first time: baseball, soccer, swimming. His first P.E. class. First trip to the beach. First time going to church. Miracle Man graduated from middle school and started high school. (And boy have I gotten short! Every time I turn around I'm getting shorter!) He drummed up his first job--on his own, might I add. I can't believe what a man he has started to become! He's showing initiative, working hard, growing into himself. Miss Sunshine sang in choir and joined track team. She's set her sails and looks toward the stars.

Last month,  we attended a clinic for challenged athletes. SL learned how he could swim. Learning how he can as opposed to how he can not. That mindset became so important during his adoption. It is a good life lesson. Figure out how you can do something rather than looking for all the ways and reasons you can't. Over my life I have watched so many people do the latter rather than the former.

Tomorrow SL will get fitted with a rough prosthetic leg and begin the journey toward walking on two legs--something he could only dream of 18 months ago. The road ahead won't necessarily be easy. He will have to use muscles in ways he has never done before. Just the motion of walking will be so alien for him. There will be socks and liners and medications none of us has experience with yet. Eventually, there will be an operation--but the folks at our hospital want to get him on the road to walking before that occurs because it will give him a positive mindset when things are hard and not working just right. He will get to know what it is to walk before any other changes get made. What freedom he will experience by not having to have a crutch to lug around all the time! He dreams of new firsts now:  riding a bicycle, driving, running in track. I've cautioned him that this first leg is a walking leg, not a running leg. "Why can't I have a running let?! I don't want a walking leg! I want to run! I hate walking legs!" How does one answer that? I did give an answer. It feels so much like holding him back--something I never want to do. We have to apply for a running leg. Prosthetics aren't cheap. A first prosthetic runs about $9,000 and subsequent ones could go up to $50,000. I will figure out how we can get him his running leg.

Just one more

Beautifully written article about proceeding to bring home just one more child. Loved ones and friends who haven't been there mayn't realize the discernment families go through in making that decision and the whys behind it. We are in discernment right for not one, but two more. At the same time. I tempted God. Funny how that goes!


http://www.nohandsbutours.com/2015/02/19/adoption-hard-start-harder-stop/#comment-15324

Sleepless Mama calls out to the universe

Recently, I have dwelled on the children I was not able to bring home. Over this past weekend, I checked on the other young men I had been considering when I started the process to adopt my son over a year and a half ago; Four boys still wait. One ages out next month. I don't want that young man's future to be one of marginalization and that feeling will not let me sleep. I cannot believe no one will scoop him up and give him all that he needs in life! Can you make room for one more child in your life? He's healthy, does all right in school, is an athlete, plays well with the other children and has a big heart. Act now. Contact me for more details and contact an adoption agency. He doesn't have time to wait.

This article appeared on one of the boards I subscribe to. It was the first thing I read this morning. Do you think it was chance that it fell into my hands to read on a night when my heart burns so much to find a young man a family that I cannot sleep? It is a long article. My heart broke all over again.

http://aeon.co/magazine/world-views/whats-it-like-to-be-disabled-in-china/

Immanuel Needs a Miracle

When I started this journey three years ago, I called this my faith adoption thinking I would name the little girl I would adopt something that meant faith. Boy, was I wrong. Pun intended. This has been an adoption testing my faith at every turn. Folks who've been on this journey with me  know the long hours I have put in to raise funds via work, selling Tupperware, making crafts to sell at bazaars, and my fundraising efforts through organizations such as Reece's Rainbow, Go Fund Me, and Bonfire funds. People have graciously donated to both of the first two funds for which I am forever grateful. I've applied for foundation grants and was very, very grateful to receive one grant which will cover a third of the mandatory orphanage donation fee.

Immanuel needs a miracle now.  Funding fell through for my plane tickets--there's a long story there of what happened and didn't happen while I was dealing with a crisis due to actions of a bus driver at my kids' school. Airplane tickets now are $2700 and above, and rising.  I have to get to China by December 28th. There's no budge room, not even a little. I have to get Immanuel on December 30th or he loses his chance for a family forever. This weekend, when I should be making final preparations, cleaning house, and finishing up stuff from work,  I am now in crisis for this child. I am his last hope. I cannot, will not, let him down.

Donations to either Reece's Rainbow or Go Fund Me are needed now. Word needs to be spread beyond the base of folks following the journey here and on FB. Make Immanuel's dream of a family come true this Christmas.

Ginger on a Mission

So incredibly grateful for this support! You have got to go check out their designs! So beautiful! Thank you thank you thank you!

 

Ginger on a Mission is feeling lead to help a specific family racing against time and would like to donate 75% of our sales to the Terry Tomaszewski family as they need to get their aging out boy by January 1st! This is a desperate situation as in Immanuel's country, he will lose his chance to be adopted on that date!

Please consider donating or purchasing from our site: https://www.etsy.com/shop/GINGERONAMISSION and specify the Tomaszewski family. Read their story here: http://reecesrainbow.org/67597/sponsortomaszewski

 

 

Calling all superheros!

You don't need a cape, the ability to leap tall buildings, or a special automobile. This t-shirt will make you a hero and empower you to give Immanuel a family,  enable him to walk, and inspire others to become superheros too! This shirt will only be available for a short time so hurry and get yours today! Quality short, long, and hoodie styles available. More information at the link below. For every shirt purchased, $15 will be donated to Immanuel's adoption. We must order 50 shirts for Bonfire to print them up and make a donation. Oh, and for every 10 shirts on an order, they will give you one free!

https://www.bonfirefunds.com/find_a_fund?s=Immanuel





We need it now, Chihuahuas in the street, and a wild ride

If you've been following my blog for a while, you have already come to the conclusion that I will get my elbow stuck in a tuba case once in a while. Okay that one really didn't happen to me. I just heard about it. But it could have happened to me.

You see Janet, it's this way (time to run and hide this signals long, impossible or headshake producing stories that actually happened-- to me.):

 Just before work a little over a week ago, I got notice of LSC receipt--early (And hooray too, the folks over in China rock! Very grateful to them. Very.). Only problem was, I was just going in the door to work, 15 miles away from my computer and the needed paperwork with no way to extricate it or get to it in anything resembling the near future. Paperwork needed now. Now. And by the by, can you get it notarized? Cleared my schedule to get the needed paperwork out the door and on its way. Almost. Meanwhile, there were Chihuahuas running in the street, bicyclists jumping out from between moving cars and one and all trying to get me to hit them. Didn't work. I made it through the gauntlet. Docs out the door and overnighted, hah!

Or so I thought. Phone call the next day: you forgot the I-864. Horrors! No, really.  The I-800 can't go in without the I-864. It just can't. It's a permission and the I-800 will just sit there, smiling on someone's desk just as if it had good sense. Or worse. It will sit in the lock box. No one really knows what the lock box is. Well, it's probably a box and has a lock on it...or maybe not. Your assigned officer cannot go get documents out of the lock box. Not even if you beg and promise to be good or say pretty please with sugar on top. I'm not sure if the supervisors can either. This is a Fort Knox kind of thing. Procedures have to be followed. I imagine a kind of Mission Impossible sort of scenario.

Phone call continues: The signed LSC copy sent back immediately--we need the original signed and dated, not just a photocopy as you'd been told.  Send both back together. A day's delay. Not good. Not good at all. There's so little time. That was Friday. Saturday, no document. Okay, it will still get there in time if sent next-day delivery on Monday. No document Monday morning. No document Monday noon, Monday afternoon, and no document Monday evening. I'm going bonkers at this point.  I call and email my case manager even though I know she won't get the messages until the next day.

I can't sleep. I'm eating chocolate nuked with peanut butter like there's no tomorrow. Try it!! It is way better than a chocolate confection made with those ingredients from the store. Make sure to use dark chocolate and don't burn it. The pieces will still have their shape, they don't have to be liquid. Add Adams peanut butter about two huge spoonfuls. After nuking, not before. About one minute in the microwave. And you'll have bliss. As long as the pyrex measuring cup doesn't explode. That didn't happen--this time.

(Note: Nothing worse than burned chocolate....well, maybe cat pee in the toaster or on a hot stove top. That is truly awful. Truly. Toaster cat exhibited either great talent or sneakiness and cunning beyond belief or maybe total insensitivity. No clues left behind to alert an unsuspecting human who can't smell.)

 Anyway, just after midnight: delivery attempted over the weekend but no one home. ARgh! They knew I wouldn't be home and it had to be sent so it could be left! Livid. And what's with sending it via USPS? Wasn't it supposed to come FedEx? Water over the dam. USPS dated the notice for February, not November. It almost got shredded. More chocolate. Try to sleep. Get up, race to post office for the document so it can get out and I can get to work. Only, there's no way they can return it same day. Not even at this early hour. No way. No way. No way. Kind of like a bad dream. FedEx can't perform the deed either. UPS? No. Suggestions? Hiring a private jet. Are you kidding me?!! You're not kidding. You leave me no option. Mama's gotta do what Mama's gotta do: Cancel work. Like I don't need the money. Immanuel's life is worth more than anything. And I'm not going down. He's coming home. That's IT!

Grab the kids. Grab the dog. At least he's happy. He gets a ride. Rides = good to him. Call and email the agency, I'm coming. Adrenaline combined with prayer and purpose carried me almost the entire way to Seattle, despite the lack of sleep. As I drove, I practiced controlled breathing, prayed, reminded myself how lucky I was to be able to take off to do something so vitally important. I counted my blessings and admired the beautiful scenery and tried to enjoy the sunshine. The original LSC got signed and submitted. The I864 had to be redone anyway to conform to new instructions which we wouldn't have been able to do without the delay and drive. Lots of times these things happen for a reason. Best of all, we got provisional I800 approval and can look forward to the official approval starting Monday (which actually, technically is today).  "Fast away the old year passes..." "Time is slippin' slippin' into the future..."

Wrong turns can be good too--especially if you end up at Ikea and get items you needed anyway plus a yummy lunch.

This week we celebrate Halloween, All Saints Day, and El Dia de los Muertos. There's another current running through this coming Sunday, Orphan Sunday. While we wouldn't be celebrating that 153 million children worldwide are orphans, there has been a movement among some church groups to dwell on support of orphans and orphan care together as a body on a single day. Here's the URL to their website http://orphansunday.org/

Since many liturgical churches celebrate All Saints Day this coming weekend, a friend of mine suggested we do Orphan Sunday on an alternate Sunday, St. Nicholas' feast day in Advent. Among other things, St. Nicholas is patron saint of children so it would be very fitting. What do you think?

Last call!! Scentsy fundraiser ends tonight!

All proceeds will go toward HH's adoption fund! If you love Scentsy and want to contribute to a great cause, now is the time!


https://scentswithadele.scentsy.us/Scentsy/Buy

A father's love

The decisions the father in this story has to make on behalf of his daughter will touch you to the core. The story is both heart-wrenching and warming.  Many parents around the globe must make these tough decisions. No parent should have to.

http://www.chinasmack.com/2009/stories/impoverished-farmer-father-abandoned-girl-daughter.html

Her birth mother found her

It wasn't her dream, but the author got to experience what many adopted children long for: reconnection with their past and with the family who had to make the difficult decision to place them for adoption.

http://www.salon.com/2013/09/16/when_my_birth_mother_found_me/

Countdown?!!

I spoke with a very nice supervisor at the National Benefits Center today. While HH's case doesn't qualify for expediting at this time, she assured me that our file would be reviewed in the next couple weeks. Meaning, if all goes well, we could be looking at travel authorization in as little as six weeks. OMG! Now, before anyone gets too excited, from the look of things, there are a couple of Chinese holidays that might make a couple weeks impact on the other side of the ocean. On this side, we have to pray we don't get an RFE. What's an RFE? Returned for errors. The homestudy that has to be turned in with the I800a application has to have very specific questions asked and very specific wording. Some adoptive families have had their I800a's RFE'd 3, 4, and even 6 times. Which means the homestudy has to be rewritten, re-reviewed, re-submitted, returned to the queue, re-reviewed...you get the idea. If we get an RFE, that would probably put us into late November or early December. More than one....I don't want to think about that. That would be a very bad place. Especially with our holidays and holiday closures starting then. Time is running out. Lord, bring my HH home. Remove all obstacles for him. Don't let this one go to places unknown.

Scentsy Fundraiser is here!

For the month of September, my friend Adele will donate all proceeds from sales at Terry's party on her Scentsy website toward HH's adoption!


https://scentswithadele.scentsy.us/Scentsy/Buy

First we scurried, then we hurried, melted a little, and, now, we wait.

By afternoon, the San Francisco Chinese consulate will have our dossier documents to authenticate. It feels so good to be at this point! Most of the paper-chasing finished! Getting that last document on Friday after so many challenges, delays, stops and starts. Thus is the adoption journey.

We traveled to Salem to get the documents verified on Monday with the plan of sending them off for authentication on the same day. We didn't count on being pointed in the wrong direction in 90 degree heat to get a money order to pay the consulate to look at and approve the docs. (Anyone hear, "I'm melting, oh what a world!"? After trudging several looonggg blocks flanked by a pair of 12-year-olds who were trying very hard to be patient, I learned we had to back track and go the other way. More trudging.

Upon reaching the cool oasis of Safeway and basking in its refreshing air while waiting for the clerk to alight from her backroom haven, she informs me: cash only for money orders. Trudge to car dragging said 12-year-olds behind with promises of McDonald's on the race home. To drop them off. To head to work. Too late to get to the store with cash. Cash. Who knew? Mffff...well, I knew--about ten years ago! But that was then, this is now. Sorry. I forgot. Like, I've only bought money orders maybe three times in my life!

Off too late from work Tuesday to get docs off.

Wednesday. Off early. Traffic. Too late to get money from bank. Think. Think. Think. Solution found. Off to get money. Off to copy and FedEx docs priority or express or whatever they call it. Docs checked twice. Return envelope inside. Money inside. Whew!

The docs should come back next week so I can turn around and send them to our agency. If all goes well. It must. Clock is ticking. I hear it reverberating in my sleep. Waking. He must come home. He must. Must.

Good news from the agency: They've almost finished the written part of the homestudy. That gets to go to the consulate as well. But they will have the adventure of sending it.

USCIS so far has been silent on the I-800a but then they may have just gotten it. It had to go through the agency first. Praying for a miracle there. Usually, it takes them 55 or more days to send back the approval. God moved the mountains for Miracle Man. God, please move them for HH!

3/18/2013 What do the children who get passed over feel about adoption?

What do the children who get passed over feel about adoption?


Warning: Have your kleenex ready.
In "Stuck" older adoptees tell what it meant to them. Please watch the movie, then join the fight to give all children a family by adding  your name to  the petition.


http://www.change. org/petitions/ make-a-child-
s-right-to- a-family- our-priority

My post on the petition:

I am mother to two wonderful adopted children and expectant mother to two more children by adoption. While my first daughter would probably have eventually found a family had I not adopted her, neither of my sons would have received a family if it were not for me. My first son has a rare syndrome which scared prospective parents off. His birth parents would not have been able to address his needs had they chosen to raise him. The director of his child care center told me no one in his 6 1/2 years had ever even asked for his file. I am a single mother. There were roadblocks to his adoption and weeks before I was to step on the plane to bring him home, the unthinkable happened: I was outsourced. I know you think I shouldn't have proceeded. I didn't turn my back on him. I had the resources. I stepped out on faith and brought him home anyway. He is now a teenager and as awesome a son as you can imagine. Where would he be if I hadn't? He was not allowed to go to school with the other children and would not have been until he had had enough operations so that he looked like everyone else--meaning he would never have gotten an education. He eventually would have ended up living on the streets, the object of ridicule, and suffering all kinds of abuse.

My son-to-be has waited for over 13 years. He has limb differences. That's all. Our local Shriner's Hospital can fit him with the prosthesis he needs. He is a very handsome young man, well-spoken, confident, and very deserving of a family--which all children are. In a few months, he will no longer be eligible for adoption. His future without a family, bleak.

In the course of adopting my children, I have worked two jobs at times, built an addition on my house (doing a lot of the work myself!) and now look toward successfully fundraising for my last two. I wish I could say they weren't my last and maybe they won't be but they likely will be. The need is so very great. Some of us feel called to have and ultimately do have birth children. Others have birth children and feel the pull of domestic or international adoption or both. Others, for whatever reason, only adopt.

I've said it many times: adoption is not for the faint of heart. An adoptive parent must be willing to undergo scrutiny by local, state, federal, and international governmental bodies, independent agencies  and a slew of other people and bodies who hopefully all concur the prospective parent worthy of parenting a child. Adoptive parents often have been through nightmare pregnancies and painful losses to realize their dream of a family. Financial burdens and an ever-changing landscape of requirements leaves many would-be adoptive parents discouraged, disheartened, and feeling the mountain is too high to climb. Biological parents don't typically have to face all this.

Every child deserves the love and care of an appropriate family. They deserve education, healthy living; freedom from abuse, neglect, forced labor, human traficking, ridicule, and stigmatization. Putting the adoption tax credit into law was a great step forward. We must step out in faith and with supreme courage and boldly make it our mission, our cause and our duty to ensure each and every child, everywhere, does not go without their needs being met. Period.